Maybe all those eyelash wishes paid off after all...

I did it! I actually did it! I can't believe I'm actually writing it! I'm back at the top! IT took just under seven years but I finally managed it, I actually managed it. After just nine days under my own management I deliver a League Cup, and now I'm top, it's unbelievable. I never thought it would be this season, I never thought it possible, but somehow this is where I am. Now I have to remember my mistakes last time I was here, and ascertain that they do not happen again, but right now I'm just enjoying being happy.

Unbelievable, incredible, how freaky as well

Ok, so somehow the last few weeks have shaped my entire season, I've mounted a challenge, a genuine challenge, yet I know there are things that I took for granted which must be restored. I'm under my own management, management that I believe is the best for me, and so far that is evidently true. There have been bizarre coincidences which have been puzzling to me, and at one point I thought I had ruined it, but my reaction shows potentially I can react positively to things not going my way, however I wouldn't place any assurity on it, and assurity isn't even a word. I made a call on tonight, and I was right, that scares me, puzzles me, and makes me wonder.

Now it's gotten interesting

Well, well, well, it appears as though history will always repeat itself, only this time I must be much more careful, that boy is an exaggerated parody and allegory of myself, because he is not me, I see him making his mistakes as he makes them, with myself I was unable to do this without hindsight. So, now what? I know that there are changes that must be made to have a chance, not nuances, but huge changes, potentially logistically, that is the dream after all. The last few weeks have been full of action, and they serve to remind me that it is possible still to mount a serious challenge, but, even if such an unlikely challenge is fought, am I confident enough to say I won't make the same mistakes as before if it doesn't go my way?

Person in charge

That's what 係 translates to, that's what I was sent when I asked who they were, back in 2007, now it could be someone else, or it could be the same person or group as it always has been, or at least I've assumed so. It's very difficult to find out more.

Are the goals of my past still the goals of my present?

I'm feeling very unsure, every now and then something strange happens and I feel compelled to document it, well, to document something, something that will trigger a memory and allow me to keep some recording of bizarre occurrences. Technically, I can achieve some of what was impossible just a few years ago, the resources are potentially available, well, not potentially, I could just go and get them. I don't think I'm really in a position right now to decide if that's the correct course of action, neither am I correct to contravene the goals of my past. I am not high enough yet, and for now, that's all I can try to change.

There's a miracle in store...

At last, a day to the rival the one's of old, snow, trouble, and giant football, out of nowhere! F*****a hasn't even spoken to me for years and the first thing he mentions is the giant ball. We spend the night throwing snow and then in the underpass playing giant football and snow games, the whole night, and then the stories we were told, crazy. Oh, and Gerrard scored that screamer.

It's only when we believe we're dead that we realise that we are still alive

Last night proves there is still hope, and the snow is metaphorically my tool again and S*****r was crazy with it. It's bizarre to conceive how different it was in early 09, when the snow was a hindrance, how it was causing me to fall backwards, to lose, and to hurt. At the end of the year I would use snow to my advantage, and would even confront my biggest enemy with it, and ever since it's been my tool, been dominated by me rather than the reverse. Title hopes would be ridiculous, but that's my philosophy. It's never too late!